Saturday, July 26, 2008

Bat holes

Here is our most amazing story to date from our little CA paradise. The first day we got there, I noticed quite a bit of rodent droppings on the front porch. I didn't think that was weird since we are out in the "country" with vineyards and orchards and no one had been living in the house for a couple months. So, the next morning I decided to spray off the porch and get things cleaned up a bit.

Next morning, more poo. Lots of it. I had to figure out where it was coming from. I noticed that some of it was actually stuck to the wall, above the window where the walls meet the eaves. So, I began spraying up there. There's about a 1/4 in. opening between the walls and the eaves, so I sprayed some water in there too.

All of the sudden, big, long, furry legs start creeping out of the 1/4 in. crack. I thought they were tarantulas. But then, they started making an unearthly noise and flying toward my head. THEY WERE BATS!!!! I can't even explain the panic that came through me. I dropped the hose, went booking it around to the other side of the house, all the while screaming horrible expletives, and found Branden. I literally ran to him, pulled on his Tshirt and stuck my head under it. While he's wearing it. I totally lost my marbles.

He took me inside then he and Katie went on the porch and enjoyed the site of tons of bats flying out going nuts. They loved it. Meanwhile, I was LITERALLY hyper-ventilating in the house and having a full-on panic attack. I would not come out of the house for a good 3 hours and just couldn't calm down. I even actually said, "If there's alcohol in this house, I'm having some."

Well, the bats didn't come back. I think we destroyed their home for good. The best part of all is when Branden talked to Phil (his cousin's husband...they own the house) he told him, "Dude, you've got a bat infestation." And Phil replied, "Oh! You met the bats! We love them so much. Every night we sit on the grass at dusk and watch them come out. It's our nightly ritual."

6 comments:

Shel said...

Speaking of bats, out here in upstate NY, thousands and thousands of bats have died off this year from some crazy disease (odd) which apparently was a huge chunk of the population. Now ordinarily, you wouldn't think this would be a big deal. Based on the funky, huge, gross, biting, nasty bugs around this year; I am feeling the loss of the bats. We need them to eat the nasty bugs up! I hope the bats can regroup by next year.

And, I like seeing them fly around out front at night too.

westeez said...

WTF???!!! Speechless. Emilie, that would drive me to drink too. What a rotten event. That is so "uncool." Holy moly, batwoman.

Paris-family said...

I am laughing, hysterically, out loud!!! That is the funniest story ever. You may need to apologize to the homeowners though...oops!! :)

LTD in Las Vegas said...

Here in Vegas we had a fuzzy little hump roosting above our front door for a couple of days....they looks all innocent enough but it still is VERY unsettling and FREAKY!

Kaerlig said...

I can see you loosing your marbles

The Scooter Lounge said...

you should pack up the bat guano and sell it at the farmers market. It's Peru's main export.